As I sit in the kitchen , sighing from a hard days work of mothering, I glance around the room. It’s silent. Dishes are being cleaned in the dishwasher. Heaven knows I don’t wash them by hand anymore. Toys are picked up and I’m contemplating the decision to go to bed or stay up to have more silence.
My eyes meet my wedding portrait. The hall light hits my face just perfectly as the Holy Spirit begins to download a message to me. I feel his presence so strongly to write it all down . So I obey.
I’ve been having a discussion on hope and joy with a dear friend. How we can still have hope in this world in the midst of trials. Loss and love. This friend and I suffered a loss of a child in similar stages and times. We have leaned on each other for comfort and simple words that bring much openness to our papa.
I pass by my bridal picture daily, but really don’t pay much attention to it. It just hangs on the wall as I scurry around to get children bathed and fed. It hangs there as I nod off on the sofa at 12 am, and fumble to bed. It hangs there when me and my Husband talk about the days events at the kitchen island, it hangs there watching me.
But tonight I saw it differently. The Lord asked me to look at my eyes in the picture. He spoke clear to me, and I’d like to share with you what he said. I believe it will bless you in your walk with him.
He said …
Look how expectant you were to be married. You trusted your husband to be with your heart. You looked forward to your life together and learning and loving . You longed for the day you would wed him to become one flesh. How happy you were to be his. You longed for the adventure ahead, without regret or grief. You knew not what lied ahead, but instead you trusted it would be good. Otherwise you may not have walked down the aisle. Your love for Matt pushed you to fix your hair that day. To pretty your makeup and pick out the most perfect jewelry. You were preparing yourself to be loved by him and him only. You gave yourself in that portrait to him.
THIS is how I want you to live your life sweet daughter. Just like this. My bride. Expectant that I will make you happy. That I will provide. That I will romance you and love you to the end of your days and beyond. That I will love you in a way unexplainable to man, but known to your heart.
When I accepted Christ as my savior when I was only three years old, I knew even then my walk with him would be fun. Hard, but fun. Even now he romances me into his arms, even when I am wrestling with him. He is so good in nature . So gentle with his words and his love for me. Just like my groom was on our wedding night.
I wouldn’t have married him If I thought our marriage would be miserable. With it’s ups and downs, through it all I am in love with my husband. Just as through it’s ups and downs with my relationship with Jesus , he is still there. Holding me along the way.
Grow with me, be joyful in times of sorrow. For I am your groom.